Juan Itor – the master of mops

The king of the cleaning cupboard

Can clean anything to a sparkling sheen

Even if it’s completely covered


With muck or with slime

With vomit or grime

No stain stands a chance while his mop hovers

And if you were dirty

And he cleaned you

It would take you a long time to recover


He speaks in sweeping statements

He could sweep you off your feet

By saying things like – “These halls are dirty

But first I must clean up the streets”


A broom handle conceals

The custodian’s sword

His spray bottle is his gun

And when his enemies smell

His bucket of bleach

They know they aren’t in for some fun


Before the police arrive on the scene

He makes sure the bad guys are tied up tight

(With an extension chord

And duct tape across their mouths)

Then disappears into the night


Nobody knows who Juan Itor is

He’s a mysterious mop jockey

And only appears

When the school doors are shut

And the punks are feeling lucky.

Juan Itor - A long funny poem about masterful mopper.